Tag Archives: EGID

Wonderful dinner, shame about the price

After a busier-than-originally-expected National Eosinophil Awareness Week, I took a much-needed sabbatical from my blog and concentrated my efforts on getting my day job and home life back in order to varying levels of success depending on which particular task you’ve decided to look at. With May half-term now behind us, it seemed an opportune moment to get back to the writing and catch up a little with our adventures over the last few weeks. Whilst there are lots of things to tell you about, I decided to start with one of my favourite things to share – the success story of a fantastic meal out.

Our household has been filled for months with the unbelievable stress of M’s SATS and by the time half-term hit, that particular challenge had been well and truly put behind us. Thanks to the unfailing support of M’s class teacher and school, we all came through the experience relatively unscathed and Mike and I wanted to do something to mark the end of that pressure and instead look forward to the rest of M’s final term in Junior school. The first weekend of half-term was the May bank holiday and we decided to surprise the children with a trip to Stratford-upon-Avon to discover more about this beautiful Warwickshire town and its most famous forefather, William Shakespeare. We had lots planned for our 2 days there and the glorious May sunshine on the Sunday made for a fantastic day. However, as always, our skills in finding somewhere safe for the whole family to eat were stretched to the limits, though our final destination on the Saturday evening proved to be a great choice.

For those of you who have never been to Stratford-upon-Avon, it is not filled with a plethora of the chain restaurants we have somewhat come to rely on as a “safe bet” when we need to feed M somewhere new and sadly the few small independent eateries we explored were unable to prepare anything that he could eat. Finally, I spotted a Zizzi restaurant and whilst we haven’t eaten there for a long time, I had in the back of my mind a vague memory of a discussion within our EGID support group, where others had had great success with eating there. We headed inside and started questioning the manager about whether there was any chance of an M-friendly dinner or not. To our delight, he reassured us that they could manage a plain grilled chicken breast with cucumber and were happy for M to eat his own rice cakes at the table.

As G, Mike and I perused the menus to make our own dinner choices, I had a sudden flash of inspiration about something I was sure I had read and, upon checking once again with our extremely accommodating manager, was delighted to be able to tell M that he could also have some mozzarisella cheese added to the dish to add a little something extra that he hasn’t been able to have when eating out before. M couldn’t wait for his dinner to arrive and G was similarly excited about her pepperoni pizza. The plates looked fantastic when they finally reached our table and both children soon made quick work of clearing the dishes without any argument. Mike and I also enjoyed our meals and we would have been more than happy to call it a night there, but it turned out that the best bit was yet to come.

Whilst G had been studying the extensive allergy menu, she had identified a couple of gluten- and dairy-free puddings that she could have and my eagle eyes had already spotted the rare possibility of lemon sorbet as a dessert for M. Our waitress was happy to grab the lemon sorbet label for me to check and as soon as I gave the go-ahead, a double scoop of sorbet and a fantastic-looking Sticky Chocolate and Praline Torte with coconut and chocolate ice-cream arrived at our table for G and M. For the last couple of years or so, there has been a campaign called #fruitisnotapudding, which seeks to encourage allergy-friendly options for dessert, rather than the somewhat ubiquitous fresh fruit salad. Over the last few months, this campaign has really flourished on social media and it’s been great to see what restaurants can do when they really think about it. As a family we rarely eat pudding whilst we’re out because there is only very occasionally some tempting and tasty options that are both gluten- and dairy-free for G, without even beginning to think about preparing a safe alternative for M. Our discovery of this delicious Torte and ice-cream for G was, for her, a dream come true and only goes to show that it absolutely can be done with some effort.

It won’t surprise you to learn that the dessert dishes were emptied just as quickly as their main course plates had been and we had 2 very happy children by the end of the meal. We thought nothing could spoil a great evening meal out for us all…until the bill arrived at our table. There is no rhyme or reason to how any restaurant charges us for the meal that they prepare for M; sometimes we have a double portion for the price of one, sometimes they just bill us for an extra or a side dish and very occasionally we have been fortunate to be gifted M’s meal for free. As is so often the case, M asked for a double portion of chicken and the plate of 2 grilled chicken breasts topped with some melted mozzarisella cheese and a healthy serving of cucumber was added to the bill at an eye-watering £27.90! Unfortunately, Zizzi’s approach to billing left us with a slightly bitter aftertaste and even though the duty manager did eventually concede to just charge us half of the original cost, we will have to think very carefully about when and if we choose to visit them again. It was a fantastic meal out for us all, but we ended up paying a lot for less than a handful of ingredients.

M’s marks: 10/10 G’s marks: 9.5/10 Parents’ marks: 9/10 for food, but a disappointing 2/10 for approach to billing

NEAW 2017 – The journey continues

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NEAW 2017 is drawing to a close, but for those of us living with EGID the journey doesn’t stop here. Everyday will continue to involve taking a number of medicines, examining food labels, careful food preparation, monitoring symptoms and hoping that the next day will be even better. Small hiccups might become major hurdles to leap, or may pass by almost unnoticed as we breathe a sigh of relief that they didn’t become something more. Parents will continue to find last-minute solutions to unexpected activities at school, plan trips out with military precision and pull together paperwork, photos and lists of symptoms to take to the next hospital appointment. We will comfort our children whatever their battle, be their most ardent cheerleaders and be prepared to tackle anything and everything to get them the very best healthcare and support. Despite the increasing uncertainty about the EGID diagnosis, we will continue to raise awareness and, more importantly, we will never stop believing in our children.

This is the short film G and M made 2 years ago to explain EGID to their classmates. Whilst M does not have his feeding tube any more, the message is as clear now as it was then and I wanted to share it again:

This year we have decided to continue our support of the amazing charity, Over The Wall and their camps. If you’re able to donate even a very small amount, please follow this link to my Virgin Money Giving Page where your donation will help more children living with chronic illness like G and M by giving them and their families a chance to enjoy some much-needed time away from it all.

NEAW2017 – Resilience

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Resilience: the ability to become strong, healthy or successful again after something bad happens.

What an amazing quality to possess and one that we’d all to like to develop, especially when times are tougher than we ever imagined they could be. Without a shadow of doubt, the EGID diagnosis has forced us all – and by us, I don’t just mean our family, but all those families living with EGID – to become incredibly resilient, even when we’re dealing with bad situations that have nothing to do with this illness itself. During last year’s NEAW, I wrote about being an EGID Mum and the heartbreak that I had been struggling with because of M’s broken leg and the lost opportunities that resulted from it. This year, the current uncertainty surrounding the validity of the EGID label has once again pushed Mike and me to our limits as we grapple with the challenge of managing the health of our child, physical and mental, whilst also dealing with the unavoidable “elephant in the room” of that unanswerable question mark about his diagnosis whenever we attend gastro appointments that seem to try and avoid using EGID as a valid reason for his current struggles. We are not the only parents who find themselves in this position as conversations amongst our EGID friends and extended family show.

Life has taught me to be resilient, to be a strong woman who’s not afraid to face up to whatever is thrown at me, even if sometimes I need to pause and take breath before I can fully deal with it all. It sometimes feels as if I’ve been put through more than most: my T1D diagnosis on my 9th birthday, losing my Dad before he had a chance to get to know my children and the threat of further sight loss last Christmas; and yet somehow I’ve managed to find my way through it all. As a family we’ve certainly had more than our fair share of chronic illnesses to contend with – T1D, EGID, Cancer, Parkinson’s, MS, Alzheimer’s disease to name a few – but they’ve taught us all one thing: that we can survive. In fact we can do more than survive, we can still have positive, purposeful lives and can definitely live and enjoy life to the full.

As a Mum, I’m proud to see the resilience that my children are building themselves, even though it is heartbreaking to realise the reasons they’ve needed to develop this character trait so early on. But their unquestionable resilience to life’s challenges, doesn’t mean that they are immune to the insensitive, hurtful and thoughtless comments of others as became patently obvious this week. M is going through a tough patch right now and we don’t really know why. We expected the anxiety of his SATS last week to affect his gastro health and returned to his simple 6-food diet to try to reduce the stresses on his body. This week has seen a real relapse in many of his symptoms and we’re struggling to see the light at the end of this immediate tunnel. I know, in that way that Mums do, that this change in events was playing on his mind, but I didn’t realise just how much until yesterday.

Yesterday, we were talking about his school year group and in particular, the jokes and insults currently being traded amongst the Year 6 boys. I reminded him that he needed to ignore those comments as best he could and instead focus on the strengths of his friendships and the fun they’re now having that SATS are finally out of the way. It was then that he paused in reflection before saying:

“…I know Mummy, which is why I’m sure X was making it up when he said that his Mum had said that she’s sick of seeing me in the local paper all time because I haven’t been and anyways, I don’t think that his Mum would have said that….would she…?”

I had to take a moment to compose my own thoughts before giving a careful and considered reply because I knew that the very fact that he had mentioned it to me meant that he was more bothered by this seemingly throwaway comment that he wanted to admit. In all honesty, I can’t answer why that Mum said that, though I can make some intelligent assumptions behind her reasoning and am certain that she never expected her child to come into school and say it directly to my son. It just shows that we need to be careful about what we say to, and in front of, our children and encourage them to be kind in their words to others.

I reminded M that our intentions are good. We’re actively trying to raise some much-needed awareness about EGID and that the annual fundraising events that he’s held at school have been the result of us proactively asking to organise them. I’m not ashamed to speak out loud about a condition that impacts us every day and I don’t want M to feel that he needs to hide the reality of what he goes through. However, he also knows he can share as much or as little as he chooses about his daily life and that there will never be pressure from us to do more than he’s comfortable with doing.

We’re lucky. Having spoken out loud to me, and then later to Mike, about this comment, M has forgotten all about it and has happily got on with the rest of his week. His ability to bounce back after a ill-considered remark that obviously cut deep is admirable and truly reflects the resilient young man he is growing up to be. Today both children have proudly gone into school wearing an element of pink to raise awareness amongst their friends. M’s “Dress up as your hero or superhero” day for Over The Wall is currently under way and he was excited to see what his friends would be wearing – he has gone as his very own hero, Ryan (the doughnut man) from Borough22. Most of all, we’ve all done our bit this week to show this disease just how resilient we are and I’m proud to acknowledge that many in the global EGID community have done so too.

NEAW 2017 – No man is an island

NEAW 2017 – Wings to fly

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As a parent, one of the biggest challenges you face is helping your child grow in self-confidence, develop independence and to ultimately give them the wings they need to fly away from the security of the family home. There are so many obstacles to overcome along the way and when a chronic illness is thrown into the mix, it can feel almost impossible to let your child take those first steps on their own. Our determination to not let EGID define either child means that every day is an opportunity to let go of our own anxieties and concerns, and encourage them to make their own decisions regardless of the limitations that health, medicine and diet place on them. Of course, much as we work to equip G and M with the skills they’ll need as they grow up, I know that they need to learn so much more than what Mike and I can teach them on our own and so we always look for any opportunity to develop their learning from experiences that are beyond our ability to give.

That’s why once again this year, I completed the application forms for both G and M to attend the fantastic camps offered by charity, Over The Wall, knowing that their respective weeks away from home will be all about friendship and understanding and being amongst equals and building self-esteem and so, so much more. When G came home from the South Siblings Camp last year, she was a different child to the one who had left us just 5 days before. The time spent with others who have a similar home life to her was invaluable as she realised that her life experiences didn’t isolate her in those circumstances; and the focus on her and making sure that she had the best time she could helped G to find a self-worth that she had been struggling to develop at home and at school. Likewise, M had what could only be described as the best week ever as he was able to spend a week away from home without family for the first time in his life. He tried his hand at activities that had terrified him before and he too found great comfort in the realisation that he is not on his own in his health challenges.

We were all delighted when G heard she had a place at this year’s Siblings Camp and we couldn’t wait to hear all about her adventures there as a Green Girl. From the moment I dropped her off with some familiar faces, including the unexpected, but much welcome presence of G’s buddy from the GOSH YPF who was volunteering for the very first time, I knew that she was destined for another great week. Their unfailing attention to detail and care for the young people they were responsible for during the camp was impressive. We received a phone-call on the second night to say that whilst G was having an amazing time, she was struggling with the “fancy” gluten- and dairy-free food that the chefs were lovingly preparing for her and wasn’t really eating as much as they would like. A quick catch-up to understand G’s food preferences and the reassurance that they would continue to keep an eye on her was all I needed to be certain that their care was absolutely everything I could want it to be.

M, Mike and I were all able to make the journey to pick G up at the end of her week away and were all immersed in the joy that is the camp bubble of OTW for the short time that we were there. Our Green Girl had tried her hand at most things, exceeded her own limitations and came away with a much-deserved pride in her achievements. This photo of a beaming G at the top of the climbing wall reflects her determination to overcome her self-proclaimed fear of heights and the pride she felt when she surpassed what she managed last year to achieve: more than she had ever believed herself capable of doing. Unlike the previous year, when she had been reluctant to take part in the Talent show, this time round, she went prepared with a routine she’s been working on during her school dance club and performed with a confidence and grace that reaped an impressive number of compliments as well as moving her YPF buddy to tears with her passion for her dance. G became good friends with several in her team and has been keeping in contact with them in the weeks following camp. She has developed a confidence and willingness to take on new challenges, knowing that, with a little bit of self-belief and perseverance, no mountain is too big for her to conquer.

It is thanks to Over The Wall that my children are becoming all that they can be and are learning that chronic illness doesn’t have to be a hurdle to anything they want to do. Over The Wall truly gives both our children wings to fly and our thanks just don’t seem to be enough.

NEAW 2017 – His illness does not define him

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Our life experiences influence our view of the world that surrounds us. Good or bad, everything we do or see or hear or learn will affect our outlook on life, on whether we become individuals who see that hypothetical glass as being half-full or half-empty and how we react to our interpretation of that reality. When you’re growing up with a chronic illness as your one constant companion, it can come as no surprise that that condition begins to shape the person you become and the relationships you have with the rest of the world.

Rightly or wrongly, I have encouraged M to embrace his EGID diagnosis and become an advocate for himself and others living with it. M is, without a doubt, so much more than this disease and yet it is an integral part of the young man he is growing up to be. Our local gastro team are keen that M doesn’t view himself as a “sick kid”, that he doesn’t let his diagnosis stop him doing whatever he wants to do or being what he wants to be and those aims sit well with our approach to helping him cope with it all. However, I can’t and won’t agree to ignoring the reality of his life – the numerous hospital appointments, admissions and procedures; the daily medicines; the restricted diet and 12 months with a NG-tube mean that he is not like his friends, like other kids his age. In the last year alone, M has been seen at our local hospital over a dozen times and that does not make him the same as the rest of his classmates. Despite everyone’s best efforts, 2 and a half years after that first feeding tube was placed, M still only eats 6 safe foods on a regular basis and that makes him stand out from the crowd, not just at school, but at every activity or event he attends. He is, in all truth, a “sick kid”, but that label does not sum up who he is as an individual.

No matter what the medics suggest, I can’t pretend that all those experiences didn’t happen to him, to us as a family, but I will endeavour to make sure that M’s illness is not all that defines him.

Yes, he’s a child who cannot eat the same as his friends; but he can eat out and enjoy food with them.

Yes, he’s a child who lives with constant pain; but he has learned to ignore it and overcome it and achieve despite it.

Yes, he’s a child who spends too much time in hospital at medical appointments; but he is developing a confidence to question and understand and advocate for himself.

Yes, he’s had experiences that most adults I know would struggle with; but he has developed tremendous courage and an increasing self-worth in who he is as an individual.

The truth is that, just as my 30+ years with T1D has shaped the woman I’ve grown up to be, M’s life has been, and will continue to be, affected by his EGID diagnosis. We cannot pretend that the difficult times haven’t happened, we can’t airbrush them out of our family history and it would be doing a disservice to the fortitude and bravery of both my children if we tried to do so. They are so much more than the sum of their parts and whilst EGID has an unquestionable influence on the individuals G and M are becoming, it absolutely does not define either of them in their entirety, and nor will we ever let it.

NEAW 2017 – Living with the unknown

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2017 marks our 5^th National Eosinophil Awareness Week and yet, in many ways and for many reasons, this year may be one of our quietest yet. One of those reasons is that over the last 12 months, we have experienced a significant shift in the way that M’s doctors view his diagnosis and that change, along with the inevitable amount of growing up that is going on in our household at the moment, means that life has become about a lot more than just the label we’ve been handed to explain his medical condition. I’ll be honest, that transitioning medical opinion has been difficult to live with because it has challenged the very way we’ve coped with the last 11 years of our life and has demanded that we examine closely all of those decisions we’ve made believing them to be in the best interests of both our children and not just M. It has made us sit back and question whether we’ve been choosing and doing the right thing.

This seismic shift that we’ve been experiencing is not isolated to our experiences or even to our part of the world, but rather appears to be part of a nationwide change in the understanding, and even the diagnosis, of Eosinophilic disorders themselves. As a parent to a child with this diagnosis, the prospect of moving away from recognising Eosinophilic Disease as a genuine medical condition is a daunting one. Whatever title you want to attach to this little-recognised health issue, the hard facts are that those diagnosed with it are struggling and suffering on a daily basis and removing the validity of its name does not, and will not, remove the reality of the problem itself. The steps we have taken over the last 4 years since diagnosis have not always been easy ones, but without a shadow of a doubt, they have been ones that have seen much improved health for M at times when we have had to make what are unquestionably the toughest of choices.

Similarly, we are not the only family who has found itself moving away from the care provided by GOSH over the last couple of years – some have moved by choice, whilst others have had little or no say in the matter. In our case, our GOSH consultant and dietitian recommended we sought local input into his care because they had reached a point where they could find no explanation for why his body reacts as it does and felt that a fresh pair of eyes might be able to give us different insight into how to go on from here. The last 8 months have been extremely challenging for us all as our local consultant has made suggestions that we are not always 100% on board with and it has taken unbelievable courage on the part of all in our family to even agree to try new things that no-one really knows will succeed in the long run. The jury is still out on whether we are currently heading in the right direction with his care and truthfully only time will tell whether the decisions we are making this time round are the right ones or not.

Without any funded research into the complexities of gastrointestinal disorders, individuals like M will always be at the mercy of what can only be seen as an experimental approach, as diet, medicines and psychology are discussed and considered and tweaked to produce the best possible outcome on very much a “trial and error” basis. In our experience, we know that food plays a huge part in the way that M’s body behaves and the medicines he’s currently on appear to be doing their job of dampening down the body’s reactions to everything he eats. Likewise, we agree that there is a psychological element to it all and have had our concerns about the psychological impact of a chronic illness on his mental well-being. Sadly, where we have currently agreed to disagree with the medics is whether the psychology plays a bigger part than the physiology when it comes to M’s day-to-day health and responses. Yes, we know that stress can wreak havoc on the digestive system of just about everyone, but we will not be swayed in our belief that it is more than that for M. The hard facts of our 11 years with M show us that his health challenge is unquestionably a physical one and we will continue to fight for greater understanding of Eosinophilic disorders and how they affect everyday living for those diagnosed with them.

This week is about raising awareness of EGID and sharing our experiences – the good, the bad and the ugly – of living with it. For us, and for the families we’ve got to know who live with it, EGID is a part of our lives that we have to accept and learn to come to terms with, no matter what discussion is being had in the medical world. It might not be clear whether EGID is in itself the final diagnosis, or if it is simply part and parcel of a larger problem that is, as yet, unknown, but it is our reality and it shapes every step that we take.

NEAW 2017 – Shared Experience

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If there’s one thing the last few years have taught me, it’s that it is truly worth reaching out and sharing the story of our experiences, as it is thanks to those who have had the courage to share their stories with us that we have found the strength and courage to persevere and carry on, even when the hardest of decisions have had to be made. Talking about the challenges that have faced us, sometimes on a daily basis, is unquestionably therapeutic and can often be a self-centred process, but I’ve learned that sometimes, when I’m speaking about a moment that represents only a small part of a much larger picture for us, that is the thing that speaks most into the heart of a matter that is a seemingly insurmountable one for another family. I’m grateful for those who have taken the time over the life of my blog to get in touch and let me know that a post I’ve written has sometimes made what is, for them, a big difference at that time in their life.

Today is the start of National Eosinophil Awareness Week 2017 (#NEAW2017), our fifth year of finding new ways to talk about EGID and telling those in our community, and beyond, about this disease. Last year, we went all out with our approach to raising awareness and raising funds for the charity, Over The Wall: I appeared for the third year in a row on our local BBC radio station, talking about life with M and with EGID, and our local paper also ran another story highlighting what we were trying to do. We attended some community summer fairs to hand out leaflets about EGID as well as running some mini carnival games to boost our fundraising total. M took some of those games into his school and shared in assembly the short film that he and G had created to explore the impact of EGID from his point of view. Likewise, G’s secondary school offered their support and ran a Year 7 non-uniform day and asked every tutor group to show their film. We extended our fundraising efforts past the third week of May and, with the help of our regional theatre who kindly agreed to have collection buckets available for 2 weeks at the end of each performance, we managed with the help of the wider community to collect more than a staggering £1,000, which I not only know will have been put to good use, but have seen in the fantastic OTW South Siblings Camp that G attended for the second time just a few weeks ago.

This year we’re taking things a little easier, though I’m still planning to write a blog post a day for the week and as a family we’re once again taking on the challenge to “Eat like M” for the duration. Our week starts with another radio appearance, with this year marking the debut appearance of M, and G if she deigns to give more than her usual, teenage monosyllabic answers on air. I am filled with some slight trepidation as to what might come out of their mouths as they speak live during the programme, but I’m looking forward to hearing what they both choose to share about life with EGID. As M’s career at his incredible Junior school draws to an end, the Headteacher has agreed to support our awareness-raising campaign for the final time and is helping M to host “Dress as your Hero/SuperHero” for the day on Friday May 19th.

We have also asked for donations of any unwanted fancy dress costumes to send to Over The Wall as part of their appeal this year. They are looking to replace as much of their existing stock as possible for camp and whilst they are grateful for any and all that they receive, they are particularly looking for costumes to fit teenagers and adults. If you have some lying around your house and want to help support this amazing charity, you can find the Head Office address to send those costumes to here. All in all, I have no doubt it will be another busy week, but hopefully a good one too and of course, you can all do your part to help us by sharing my blog posts wherever you can to reach out to your community and share our EGID experiences.

7 years to diagnosis

Searching for an answer