Category Archives: Family

14 already?!

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I really don’t know how we got to this day as it doesn’t seem like a year since we celebrated her becoming a teenager and certainly not 14 years since we welcomed her into our lives. 14 years filled with love and laughter, tears and tantrums, moments of great pride and times when we’ve wondered if we were getting the whole parenting thing even vaguely right. Today we have a beautiful, sensitive, generous and kind-hearted young lady as an invaluable part of our family, even if we could do without the slamming doors, stomping feet and looks of pure disdain that do radiate from her almost weekly without fail.

Happy 14th birthday Floss – you are our whole world. Love you always xxx

 

On the 5th Day of Christmas…

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There’s nothing I love more than decorating the house for Christmas, although the last 3 years have each carried their own challenge to being able to achieve that, with admissions to GOSH 2 years in a row followed by a health scare with my eyes last year. This year we’ve all been at home, all been in reasonable health and have all had a part, however small, in bringing the Christmas spirit into our home. Sunday was the day to “deck the halls” at home and M in particular couldn’t wait to get started on trimming the tree. With Christmas carols playing in the background, mulled wine warming on the stove and the advent candle burning down on the mantlepiece, the Christmas season really has begun.

I always feel particularly nostalgic when it comes to pulling the decorations out for our Christmas tree as each bauble evokes its own precious memory. Every year we buy at least one new decoration for each child for the tree and frequently they end up with more than one depending on our travels and on friends and family members who also buy and add to our collection. By the time G and M are ready to fly the nest and have their own homes to spend the festive season in, they will each have a boxful of decorations to trim their Christmas trees. As we unwrap each ornament, the memories of time spent together and journeys made wash over me and there are often stories to share as we reminisce about times past.

It’s hard to pinpoint my favourite decoration as there are so many happy memories encaptured in the beauty of our tree. There’s the small gold bauble with a red ribbon that marks our wedding as I hand-wrote enough for every guest to have one as an alternative wedding favour to celebrate the day. I have 2 handmade snowflakes from a German Christmas market, which my Dad brought back from a business trip and that have a special place in my heart. There are many from our holidays both before and after G and M arrived in our family – China, Australia, Ireland, Canada and even Greece to name but a few. Amongst the most precious are those the children have made over the years, from simple paper and sparkles in their nursery days to the hand-decorated ceramic ones that M made during his last hospital admission.

Today is the 5th day of Christmas and I’m looking forward to the memories we’ll be creating this year as we count down to the big day itself.

All Different, All Equal

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This week is Anti-bullying week and this year the campaign has adopted the tagline “All different, All equal” to promote difference and equality in schools. As the Anti-bullying Alliance’s website states, the idea behind this is to “…help children and young people celebrate what makes them, and others, unique and help them understand why it’s important that every child feels included in school able to be themselves without fear of bullying...” This has struck a particularly resonant chord with me as feeling different to classmates is something that not only do I recall from my own school days, but something I am aware both G and M have felt over the years.

For me, and let me be brutally honest right now, I hated every moment of living with T1D as a teen. Not only was I having to deal with the challenges of impending adulthood and puberty like all of my peers, but my T1D added another layer to the emotional mix that I really didn’t want to have to face. At school I felt like the odd man out. I didn’t really know anyone else my age with T1D and I was the first diabetic in my school. I suffered extreme teenage angst about not being able to buy sweets and chocolate from the break-time tuck shop and that seemingly small thing became a massive problem that I struggled to overcome. My friends accepted my differences far more readily than I did and yet I felt alienated from them. My own anxieties and poor self-image became mountains I just couldn’t scale, particularly when some of the other girls in my school year began to exclude me from friendships that had been there since I was little and threw cruel words in my direction which hit incredibly deep.  Whether they had truly identified my lack of self-esteem as an easy target for their unkind comments and actions or not, I can still recall just how devastating that time in my life was for me. I’m sure that I was not on my own with those feelings, but I felt isolated in a world that seemed to be quite happy without me.

Sadly, G struggled similarly during her Infant school years when so-called friends who had helped ease her move to a new school, discovered that her health issues could be used as a taunt against her and caused her unbelievable emotional pain. Thanks to a fantastic and supportive Year 2 teacher, G was encouraged to tackle the bullies and their behaviour head-on and she learned to stand up for herself, something I didn’t learn until I was much, much older. I know that her gluten- and dairy-free diet still makes her feel too different to the rest of her tutor group for comfort and she has struggled with sticking to the restrictions, especially when her friends are enjoying treats that she would love to be able to eat. We’ve worked to fill her lunchbox with foods and snacks that make her feel a little more “normal” and a part of the crowd, and I will continue to hope that this doesn’t become a cause for bullying as she moves her way through secondary school.

Likewise, M’s complex medical needs have left him being subjected to cruel words and unkind actions in the past, something that is not unusual in the world of chronic illness. Whether it is an obvious physical difference, or something more hidden like T1D or allergies, the sad truth is that children can, and will, be cruel. All children are fighting to find their place in the world and will look to find their footing without regard for those surrounding them and especially not for their feelings. As parents we need to teach our children about the beauty in diversity and encourage them to be kind in their thoughts and deeds. My children are wonderfully unique as are their friends and that is something to embrace wholeheartedly and without reservation. This year I will be making sure that they understand the truth in these words: All different, all equal.

The Newest Addition

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Back at the start of this year, Mike and I managed to escape the UK and headed to New York for the week to celebrate my 40th birthday. It was a fantastic trip where we had so many fabulous experiences and yet a single event managed to interrupt our time away from home and left us having to consider how to break some very sad news to our youngest once we were back.

M’s beloved cat, Ginger, who had proved to be an invaluable part of our family as he brought so much comfort to M at some of the most difficult times of his treatment over the years, was hit and killed by a car on the main road near our house. My Mum, who was looking after G and M whilst we were away, somehow managed to keep this news from them both, even though they were checking in at home every couple of days to feed the cats and M’s dragon, Leo. I knew that this would be hard news for M to hear and feared a similar reaction to when we discovered one of our twin black cats had suffered the same fate 6 years ago when M was just 5. Back then, M had spent the entire evening and much of the night in tears and refused to eat for nearly 24 hours, an experience I hoped we’d be able to avoid.

Both children were upset when we finally broke the news, and although G’s response was fleeting, M struggled almost as much as we had expected. Much to my relief, the effects of this loss were not so long-lasting and within days M had moved on to what was obviously to be the final part of him coming to terms with the situation: the request for a new kitten. Knowing our son as well as we do, this didn’t come as any surprise to either Mike or me and we had already agreed on our answer. We would consider getting him a new kitten, but it would need to wait until we had got through SATs, past our summer holiday in Greece and were settled into the new school year.

Much to our delight, M could see the sense in this suggestion (something that doesn’t often happen) and happily agreed to delaying our search until the end of the summer at the earliest. Over the following weeks and months, G and M discussed at length what they were hoping for in a replacement pet. It had to be a kitten (because they’re cute), it had to be ginger (because Ginger was) and it had to be a boy (because…well…just because). Almost as soon as we arrived home from Greece, the search began and I spent the next couple of weeks online to find out what kittens were available in one of the many cat rescue centres in the area. To our delight, my enquiry about a different set of kittens led us to the discovery of the delightfully named “Bill and Ben”, a pair of ginger toms who were both looking for a new home.

Despite the best entreaties of G, who fell in love with “Ben” when we met them for the first time, and the surprising expectation of both Mike and my Mum that I would come home with both kittens, I managed to stick to what we had originally agreed and so it was that “Bill” joined our family at just 10 weeks old. He has been a source of great joy and many giggles since he first joined us at home, though his current tendency to bite everything in sight, particularly ankles and feet, has led to some frustrated shouts of pain too.

Now at nearly 4 months old, I take great pleasure in introducing you to the newest addition to the 7Y2D household: Biggles!

    

Halloween Pumpkins

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Ok, so it might not be Halloween just yet, but I thought I’d share some photos of the pumpkins that Mike and the children have spent time designing and carving over half-term. Halloween has never been a time to celebrate for me and was certainly never a significant time of year when I was growing up. My childhood was spent making a Guy for Bonfire night, rather than carving a pumpkin for Halloween and I never imagined it would become a regular part of our household’s routines. However, 20 years on from when I first met Mike in Canada and experienced trick-or-treating North-American style with my university friends, Halloween has become a family time with the children not only carving pumpkins with Mike, but often also with my Mum during half-term.

I’ll be honest, I’m not a fan of Halloween at all. We don’t go trick-or-treating with the children, though I absolutely support the work of the Teal Pumpkin Project which encourages households to provide non-food treats as a safe alternative to sweets for allergy children, so they can be a part of the experience alongside their friends. And I spend most of the week leading up to the day itself in an increasingly dark mood as October 31st is the anniversary of losing my Dad. It is always a difficult time of year for me, but I’m glad that the children are able to enjoy some fun time being creative with Mike and carving the pumpkins helps them celebrate their dual heritage in a unique way.

 

 

 

Greece Photo Round-up 2017

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Making the most of our 10 days in Greece was everything we needed it to be this summer. It’s been a big year: with me changing job, G becoming a teenager, M taking SATs and the move to having 2 children at secondary school; and we all appreciated the chance to escape from the day-to-day and spend some precious family time together relaxing and enjoying each other’s company. From the ancient monuments in Athens to the beauty of Syros, Greece was an amazing holiday destination and one place we would love to return to again.

Unexpected Greek Treats

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We might have packed a suitcase full of a variety of allergy-friendly foods to keep us going during our 10 days in Greece, but, as ever, we kept our eyes open for any M- and G-friendly Greek treats that we could spot in the supermarkets. delicatessens and local shops in Athens and on Syros. I had no doubts that we could find the bare essentials of soya milk, goats’ cheese and rice, but it’s those unexpected finds that make all the difference when we’re travelling as a family.

The first fantastic find, and one that we found ourselves stocking up with to last the duration of our stay, was this unassuming pack of smoked chicken fillet that quickly became a firm favourite with M. Mike had ventured out of our Athens studio one afternoon and found a delightful small deli less than 5 minutes walk away. They had a huge selection of fresh and dried olives, oils, cheeses, breads and cooked meat, but it was the smoked chicken that caught his eye as we had been struggling to find an appetising way to cook and serve chicken for M, who is not the biggest fan of cold chicken at the best of times. The smokey flavour was something new to him and whilst he was prepared to let the rest of the family have a small taste to see just how delicious it was, he insisted that the remaining slices were his and his alone. Mike also discovered these brown rice cakes with pink Himalayan salt, a surefire hit with M and the perfect base for his smoked chicken fillet sandwiches that became a lunchtime staple.

As we had expected, we had no problem in sourcing goats milk, butter and cheese for G in Athens and were also delighted to find both almond and hazelnut milk there too. She quickly fell in love with the traditional Greek Feta cheese and ate it as frequently as M devoured the chicken fillet for lunch. We also found a small selection of gluten-free crisps that they both enjoyed on occasion as just a small snack when needed. However, it was on Syros that we were truly amazed by the unexpected plethora of allergy-friendly foods we found in the very small supermarket in the seaside village of Finikas. When we ventured inside on our first day on the island, we were hoping that we might be lucky to find some soya milk for G to drink and were completely blown away by this astonishing selection of dairy-free alternatives, from almond milk to chocolate soya milk, goats cheese, butter and yoghurt, and the one item we had never expected to find there: rice milk.

This tiny treasure trove also stocked a small, but comprehensive selection of gluten-free products including rice cakes for M, gluten-free pasta, bread and biscuits. We bought a couple of different flavours of the allergy-friendly biscuits that quickly became a favourite with G. These were a welcome treat and alternative to dessert for her especially when accompanied by some small slivers of Feta, whilst M enjoyed the opportunity to pick and devour fresh figs from the trees surrounding our villa at the Good Life. Having discovered these unexpected Greek treats, we made an effort to buy a few extra packs of biscuits and rice-cakes alike to bring back home with us to keep the memory of our Greek adventures alive for just a little longer.

Eating Out with Allergies in Greece

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It feels a little as if this is becoming a mini-series in itself: a list of the countries where we’ve successfully managed to find a safe way to eat out with food allergies with both children. In the last year, Mike and I have been impressed by the options we have found in both Italy and New York whilst travelling without the children and our summer in Portugal last year was a great success thanks to the freefrom choices we uncovered there. Our decision to venture to somewhere new this August meant we had to adopt our usual 3-prong approach to travelling with food allergies:

  1. Pack an extra suitcase with the bare minimum of everyday essentials that we will need to cater for both G and M in our self-catering accommodation;
  2. Relax the rules a little for M and allow him to enjoy the full Greek experience on occasion, whilst keeping him strictly to his restricted diet the rest of the time; and
  3. Be prepared by doing some research about restaurants in advance and be willing to explain at length numerous times just how restricted his diet is.

Our careful planning ahead meant that we were all able to eat 3 meals a day without too much stress and we achieved some great successes along the way. We had started a new approach to food trialling about 6 weeks before we travelled, whereby we chose 3 foods to challenge M with over a 3-month period and had strategically picked the ones we thought would be of most use whilst we were in Greece. This is the 3rd way of food-trialling we’ve tried over the last 12-18 months, all with the support of our local hospital, and whilst I still have my concerns about whether this really is the best approach to take, it did allow us more flexibility that we’ve had before. M decided he wanted to trial olives, prawns and bananas and these seemed a good fit with our Mediterranean break.

We found several highlights in Athens, including our perennial favourite, the Hard Rock Cafe, where we ventured on one of our more relaxed days to the topic of M’s restricted diet. He enjoyed every mouthful of his gluten-free burger and chips with great gusto and even though the increased dose of medicines we had agreed with his consultant before we went didn’t fully tamper down his body’s response, it was a real treat for us to see the delight on his face when faced with something a bit different to the varieties of chicken, rice and cucumber that he’s become accustomed to at home. The waiting staff worked hard to accommodate our additional requests around making sure the meals were also dairy-free and the vegetables added to the plate were restricted to just cucumber for both children as we had asked.

When you wander through the Plaka in Athens, you are surrounded by a huge array of small tavernas to choose from, ranging in price and, if I’m honest, authenticity. It was surprisingly easy to cater for M at nearly all of these and the ones we ended up eating at were delightfully keen to prove themselves to us. Every menu seemed to contain grilled chicken and rice and it was just a case of just how much of an accompaniment they were able to serve, with most preparing small salads of cucumber, apple and pear. G tended to play it safe and opted for the easy option of steak and chips – or sometimes steak and rice – though we did manage to convince her to try mouthfuls of our more authentic Greek dinners, which she reluctantly had to admit to enjoying despite herself and her preconceived ideas! One evening we even found a restaurant serving gluten-free pasta and G enjoyed a delicious spaghetti bolognaise, albeit in the wrong part of Europe.

We didn’t really eat out too much on Syros as we instead took advantage of the beautiful local produce that Nick had kindly sourced for our pantry at the Good Life and spent time preparing, cooking and enjoying simple meals at our villa. However, we did choose to eat some lunches at the beachside restaurants and this is where having olives and prawns as a menu option really came into its own as M indulged in some delicious meals including those tasty morsels, whilst munching on the Greek rice-cakes we had managed to buy in both Athens and Syros.