Tag Archives: first-born

Sweet Sixteen

We did, of course, always know that this day would come, but even so, how is it that my eldest baby turns 16 today?

When I look back at the first 16 years of her life, they have not been as easy as any of us imagined or would have wished for when we first held her in our arms. I don’t think our wishes at that moment in time were for anything more than a healthy baby and a happy childhood filled with rich experiences and every opportunity we could offer her. We were determined to encourage that newborn to try her hand at anything she wanted and to reach for her dreams with a belief that she could achieve them.

It’s no surprise that life got somewhat in the way of those plans, what with the advent of her own unexpected health challenges, let alone the more demanding ones of her baby brother, and yet we continue to tell her to shoot for the stars in whatever she does. Fear and anxiety have plagued her over the last couple of years, and yet she keeps going, hopefully knowing that Mike and I have her back and will be there to not only support her, but to walk every step of her journey with her as well as pick her up and carry her if she needs us to.

To say we’re proud of G would be an understatement. Our funny, generous, gorgeous girlie may be able to throw the monster of all teenage tantrums at times – her 2 year old self had nothing on her now – but she has an incredibly gentle and beautiful spirit. She may find the stress of exams overwhelming, but she perseveres with her studies and loves nothing more than curling up with a good book or listening to music in her downtime. Her passion to dance is inspiring and she finds a true release through her movements that you can see reflected in the joy that crosses her face every time she performs, be that on stage or in the safety of her own bedroom.

As I sit here tonight, what do I wish for the next 16 years and beyond? I wish her health and happiness and a future that’s filled with dreams, just as we did when she was born. I wish her friends as well as family that will love her and support her, no matter what, and a home that’s filled with love, even when tears and anxieties overwhelm. I wish her a career that’s fulfilling and satisfying, even though she has no idea what she wants to do as yet. Most of all, I wish her every confidence to be her; to be true to who she is and to always be able to stand up for herself and for others.

Sweet 16th birthday sweetheart, we all love you very much xxx

In the blink of an eye

Despite the numerous hospital visits over the last few weeks – think local hospital…GOSH…local eye hospital…Moorfields…local hospital….local eye hospital….local hospital – this December has been everything I’ve longed for it to be and so much more. For the first December night in a long time, it’s fast approaching midnight Friday and my evening of work is only just beginning. In the last couple of hours, I’ve knocked up a batch of img_12811M-friendly apple and pear cupcakes, a batch of G-friendly vanilla cupcakes and I’m currently struggling with the chocolate brownie sponges that are refusing to be moved from the cake tins. There’s 2 lots of icing to sort out, decorations to be finalised and they all need to be applied to the cakes themselves, but I’m delighted to find myself spending this winter evening like this.

Not only have we broken the December 3rd curse of an admission to hospital, but we’ve also beaten the steady stream of bad luck that has engulfed G’s birthdays for the last couple of years and are getting to spend the day itself at home with our most favourite young lady. Well, I say at home, but of course, the path of G’s birthday never did run quite that smooth, but it’s as close to being at home for the evening as we could wish. It’ll be a day of “work as usual” for us all and our evening plans are dominated by M’s school’s carol service, but we’re all together and that’s something that hasn’t been possible since 2013. All that being said, it does appear that we have created a new December tradition when it comes to G’s birthday and it’s a good thing img_12861that my sense of humour is very much in tact. It was with a wry smile that G and I summoned a black cab to take us to GOSH on Sunday from the train station, not for a visit to a hospital-bound younger brother, but  this time for the final YPF meeting of the year. I’m not sure that Christmas would be Christmas for me without the opportunity to wander the length of Oxford Street on the hunt for last-minute gifts and small stocking stuffers!

img_12881It feels even more special this year as my baby girl, my precious first-born, hits the start of her teen years and all the emotions that those have to bring. In the proverbial blink of an eye, my December 2003 baby is turning 13 and in front of me stands a beautiful young lady, with a little more attitude and grumpiness than I would have chosen, but with a kind heart, generous spirit and the most loyal friendship on offer that you could ask for. She is growing up fast and we are quickly losing sight of the easy-going, chatty toddler that she was as an opinionated, independence-seeking, moody teenager appears in her place. She can slam doors with the best of them and her stomping feet can make it feel as if the kitchen ceiling is about to come down at any moment – and indeed it pretty much has done. These days she brooks no nonsense from her little brother and yet she will defend him to the hilt when it comes to it and is there to comfort and hug even when he doesn’t want it. She’s looking to make sense of a world that often doesn’t and is trying to understand how to interpret the nuances when it would be so much easier if everything was clearer defined in black and white. She can be the much-needed splash of colour in a reality that is all too often dark and depressing and yet will quietly fade into the background when everything gets too intense and too much. She is an incredible blessing to all our lives and we are all so grateful to be celebrating a life that is so much better for the 13 years she’s been an integral part of it.

Happy 13th darling G, we love you so very, very much xxx