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The last 11 years have been filled with one parenthood-survival lesson after another and it has to be said that the majority of those can be attributed to M.  I’ve now honed my parenting techniques to become, not just referee, cheer-leader, taxi-driver and chief bottle-washer, but also self-made expert in rare gastro conditions, skilled negotiator with both small children and medical professionals alike and ardent advocate for (my) children’s rights.  Our latest, and steepest, learning curve carries an uncanny echo of the challenges my own parents had to conquer nearly 30 years ago when faced with the diagnosis of my Type 1 Diabetes (T1D).  They had to learn fast all about blood sugar monitoring, counting carbohydrates and, perhaps most daunting of all, how to give insulin injections.  There could be no question of whether they felt comfortable in doing these things because they knew that their new role in my life was not just as parents, but as the front-line defenders of my everyday health.  I have hazy memories of learning to inject on an orange and know that those oranges were subject to the first faltering attempts of my whole family.

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We’ve had to learn how to feed our child via NG-tube, a process known as enteral feeding and similarly there’s be no time to stop and question whether we were ready, willing and able to do this because M’s health demanded it of us.  Each step is not particularly complicated in itself, but the anxiety of remembering what we had to do and when was overwhelming in the first couple of weeks and I was scared of getting it wrong.  Due to a desperate need for M’s bed in the long-term gastro ward at GOSH, I had no choice but to learn as much as I could as fast as I could, so as not to be left struggling once we were back in our own home.  We have the support of an excellent nursing team from Nutricia, the company who provide M’s pump, feed and medical supplies, but that’s it.  Mike and I have quickly had to become experts in this new part of M’s journey and the extraordinary has now morphed into the routine.

For those of you who have never had to do enteral feeding, or who are learning about it for the very first time, my next couple of blog posts will cover the process in a “step-by-step” approach, which will hopefully give some useful tips on managing tube feeding.  I would also highly recommend reading this blog post by fellow blogger, MumAnnie123 – it was my “go-to” article when we were incarcerated at GOSH and gave me lots of tips and advice about maintaining my sanity as we ride the NG-tube feeding roller-coaster.  The one thing I’ve quickly learned is that everyone will have a slightly different approach, be they parents or medical staff, so make sure you follow the basic rules, adopt recommendations that meet your family’s needs and adapt to a routine that suits you and your child the best.  At the end of the day, you are the people living with the elemental feeding and need to have a system that works for you – alter the feeding routine to work with and around your life at home.

Following a timetable that is hugely reminiscent of our days with a baby, each day actually begins the night before, when I have to make up the bottles of M’s feed alongside the preparation of G’s packed lunch for the next day.  Each evening as I boil the kettle, I gather everything needed to make his feed – packets of the Elemental E028 powder, scoops (1 blue, 1 yellow), a 1 litre plastic measuring jug, hand whisk and 2 sterile packs containing the 500mls and 1000mls plastic feeding containers, also more glamorously named “reservoirs”.

We have a detailed “recipe” for M’s E028 feeds, which was calculated by the GOSH dietetics team to provide the calories and nutrients he requires daily based on his age, height and weight and I carefully measure the required scoops of the formula into the measuring jug.  Next comes adding the boiled water, which was surprisingly trickier than it sounds as Mike and I both made mistakes on our first weekend at home.  What hadn’t been made clear to us in the hospital was that the water added is enough to make the required amount , in M’s case 550mls, and NOT, as we both first read it, add 550mls of water to the mix.  Whilst this sounds a fairly inconsequential error, the nuance was important and the outcome was that we ended up with a lot more formula that M could drink and at a lower concentrate that he needs to remain healthy.  I add the boiled water whilst it’s still warm as I’ve found this dissolves the powder more thoroughly and a good whisk ensures that there are no lumps poured into the feed bottles.  This is important as those miniscule lumps can be enough to block the tube and cause the pump to alarm.

Feed mixed and bottles filled, we then store them in the fridge for up to 24 hours, following the advice of both our dietitian and the community nurse, who reassured us that this was safe to do and is a shortcut that makes my life a whole lot easier.  M hates having his E028 cold, so I make sure that the bottle is taken out of the fridge at least 30 minutes before his feed is due to start and warm it in a bowl of hot water – a great tip shared by the nurses at GOSH.  The first few days felt chaotic as I rushed around making up feed, storing bottles and trying to make sure that we were doing everything we were supposed to do.  Now I’ve found we’ve fallen into a steady rhythm as I’ve found my feet in making this process work for me and that was the key to our success.